*Highlights of our Carabao cart ride Adventure*
Right off the bat... we break the axle on our cart... it was so Oregon Trail.
(I just Googled to find a screen shot of the Oregon Trail Game so everyone could remember what an awesome game it was... and Google told me I could play the original Oregon Trail Game! Online! For Free! I have been trying to do that for the past 30 minutes... Google is a liar. Now I have about 10 useless plug-ins and most likely a virus. Thanks a lot Google....)
On our way...
Stop for a potty break...
(Note to Driver: Next time, "Privacy Shield" should be held up a bit longer in order to avoid Keely getting drops of liquid poo on her forehead...)
Photo shoot with a stranger begins...
(Note to French Man: I am not a photographer... Yes, I will take a picture of you, but no I do not want to spend 15 minutes taking your picture from various angles... (even though I did.) And no I will not put your camera strap over my head... it reeks of B.O. I am not an idiot... I will not drop your camera in the water. Additionally, you are certainly not a model... no matter how much you "adjust" yourself in your tiny man shorts, flex your abs, lean "seductively" against rocks, and stare off into the distance. Please stop. Not only are you embarrassing yourself, but I don't know how much longer I can keep a straight face...)
Me: That looks dangerous... I don't think we should go any further...
Lee: No, we are exploring. It's fun!
Me: Well, I'm getting parched... it's tiring being a pioneer...
(Note to Lee & Hassan: You guys are assholes. I am hanging on for dear life, hoping I won't get washed away in the rapids and you guys are laughing and taking pictures instead of helping me. And no Hassan, I do not look like a cat who can't get out of water...)
My husband... he has no fear of death...
(No... not death... just fear of something poking him in the butt. Awesome.)
Me: I don't want to go this way... I've had dreams about places like this... see all those vines... in my dreams they turn to snakes... and it totally sucks.
(Obviously... they didn't care.)
And to bring the day full circle... Lee sits down for lunch... and crack...
Lee: Wow... I'm really not feeling good about myself... first the axle and now the bench...